even though things were like, cerita lama, i still can't help but to feel mad whenever she haven't had any rants or anything about me.
i'll go, "DON'T YOU FUCKING IGNORE ME BITCH!!!"
and there goes me imagining any way to fuck her life.
overstatement.
ways to ANNOY her.
fuck this. it's going to be hard if every crushes would go this way.
wo wait...
it isn't like i never had any of this before. how did i get over all those?
*drumroll*
i just have a crush on somebody else.
seems like i shouldn't worry about this afterall.
to celebrate my effort-proof, emotion-protection mechanism i've just realized within me,
cows & cows & cows!!!
p.s: eggs and corned beef are the best food ever! so are whey and coffee.
p.p.s: oh hey... ADA EXAM LA ESOK!!!
p.p.p.s: OK WTF MUST HIDE THE OTHER BLOG SO I DON'T DUMBLY POST MY FREAKING THOUGHTS OH NO LOL I SHOULD FREAKING LOOK WHERE I CLICK.
weddings
i don't know if we even have any chemistry between me and her.
and hell no. i'm NOT thinking about MY wedding.
maybe someday la.
watching vids of weddings makes me feel left out.
it's not about, "oh they are married at last fuck i should too"
no.
whenever i am in one, the atmosphere always gives out, cozy comfy feeling.
like what i would get whenever i'm in my room.
watching their videos of grandiose weddings, gives out an extra feeling of triumph that the fate of humankind is bright indeed.
like what their parents would feel.
watching someone's sister's wedding however, gives out a slightly altered version of coziness.
like what an outcast of a lions pride would feel as it watch the pride roam high, proud and strong.
watching weddings of people you once hated gives out an air of ease and forgiveness.
like... whatever.
or maybe it's all like being in the center of an eye of a hurricane.
wait...
it's like, watching someone else being dumped into the eye and observe as he/she awed at the beauty of the scenery and getting fucked up by nature's wrath later.
ok i admit i'm just jealous.
yes. i envy those who managed to get into that kind of happiness.
although i envied, i don't really wish for one.
i don't know. afraid of commitment. fear of rejection. lazing around, wasting time. lame excuses.
and hell no. i'm NOT thinking about MY wedding.
maybe someday la.
watching vids of weddings makes me feel left out.
it's not about, "oh they are married at last fuck i should too"
no.
whenever i am in one, the atmosphere always gives out, cozy comfy feeling.
like what i would get whenever i'm in my room.
watching their videos of grandiose weddings, gives out an extra feeling of triumph that the fate of humankind is bright indeed.
like what their parents would feel.
watching someone's sister's wedding however, gives out a slightly altered version of coziness.
like what an outcast of a lions pride would feel as it watch the pride roam high, proud and strong.
watching weddings of people you once hated gives out an air of ease and forgiveness.
like... whatever.
or maybe it's all like being in the center of an eye of a hurricane.
wait...
it's like, watching someone else being dumped into the eye and observe as he/she awed at the beauty of the scenery and getting fucked up by nature's wrath later.
ok i admit i'm just jealous.
yes. i envy those who managed to get into that kind of happiness.
although i envied, i don't really wish for one.
i don't know. afraid of commitment. fear of rejection. lazing around, wasting time. lame excuses.
attittude problem
first of all, never. ever. brag.
be sincere. talk to girls not for bragging rights. it's just for being nice.
ahahaha!!! ok...
that is so hypocritical.
i've always been stuck with bro's before hoes kinda thing and being mildly braggy about my luck with girls has always been one of my favorite joke topic.
putting that out of the equation just makes me a plain loser.
the fuck was that?! have i ever care about anything else?
I NEED SOMETHING TO JUSTIFY THINGS
the brags just have to go though.
i've been into somekind of dilemma monologue debate just now, and what i've decided to settle is,
fuck the bro thing. and fuck the ladies man thingie too.
fuck everybody.
i talk to whoever i want. i'll fuck whoever i want.
in the end, being a jerk is always the best, between the fences, solution.
now...
to learn how to be a NICE jerk...
on an irrelevant notice, stop bothering girls on impulse.
be sincere. talk to girls not for bragging rights. it's just for being nice.
ahahaha!!! ok...
that is so hypocritical.
the fuck was that?! have i ever care about anything else?
the brags just have to go though.
i've been into somekind of dilemma monologue debate just now, and what i've decided to settle is,
fuck everybody.
i talk to whoever i want. i'll fuck whoever i want.
in the end, being a jerk is always the best, between the fences, solution.
now...
to learn how to be a NICE jerk...
on an irrelevant notice, stop bothering girls on impulse.
mata keranjang
or whatever.
remember the last entry i've made about me approaching beautiful girl?
there is a flaw with it.
who am i supposed to go to when there were TOO MANY pretty girls?!
and yeah, lately, i'm starting to lag when it comes to updating you, dia-chan.
one thing is, my life had been kinda boring.
i'm getting bored of everything.
this will be proven by sudden end of this entry/post/whatev
remember the last entry i've made about me approaching beautiful girl?
there is a flaw with it.
who am i supposed to go to when there were TOO MANY pretty girls?!
and yeah, lately, i'm starting to lag when it comes to updating you, dia-chan.
one thing is, my life had been kinda boring.
i'm getting bored of everything.
this will be proven by sudden end of this entry/post/whatev
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